PRIMITIVE SCREWHEADS

Playin' with Balls and Beer

The Presurfer has a link to a flash game you play with balls. You get a selection of balls and you have to mark them and pack them for shipping. That link lead me to Bontegames. I liked playing the Day of the Bobteds. You might have seen some of the Bonte Room games like The Bonte Room or Loose the Moose. Some are more frustrating that others. Day of the Bobteds is a bit simpler. If you get trajectories then you have a leg up.

The Presurfer also has a link to a beer themed game called Le Courage. I did pretty good until the end. It was hard to keep the sun from falling into the ocean. It's really fuckin' heavy, and it's hot. Nice looking graphics.

Teledildonics

There was an article on MSNBC.com today about Teledildonics (internet connected sex toys) for a couple to use while apart. Here's a review from Wired. Here's a naughty demo. Contains nudity. I knew you couldn't stay away. The Sinulator is like an early telephone. Still pretty lo-tech, certainly no holo deck. Don't forget to take the test drive. Has to be seen to be stuf...yeah. I think that's enough.

Older, fatter and even less talented

Greg bought a copy of Hillbilly Monster, a 2003 film by Conrad Brooks. Brooks was a pal of Ed Wood. He acted in several of Ed's pictures, and continues dabbling in the low budget arena to this day. Just reading the titles of the pictures he's been in is a hoot. Certainly more hooty than Hillbilly Monster. Here's the plot summary from the IMDb.

While "working" for a travelling freak show, the Hillbilly Monster escapes his life of humiliation and servitude. Alone and afraid he becomes injured by an unfriendly bear trap. Befriended by a psychologist and a strange groundskeeper, he recovers from his ordeals in the wilderness and moves on to live a free and better life.

That almost makes it sound like a real movie, doesn't it. Unfortunately the execution is so poor even I couldn't find anything worth being joyous about. Even the pretty girls aren't. It's also the 3rd in the Jan-gel series. I haven't seen those but a reviewer on the IMDb said it was the best of the three. Sad. It didn't even make me laugh, and neither did Grandparents from Outer Space. Conrad and some older gal are the grandparents looking for their grandkids who are stranded on earth. At least it's only 40 minutes or so. Still it was like diamonds, forever.

Greg also lent me the slightly better but still not very interesting Horror Maniacs, or The Greed of William Hart.  A short 52 minutes b-feature from 1948 Horror Maniacs is a Burk and Hare type story. Two greedy guys start killing people to supply a doctor with cadavers. Naughty naughty. Don't bother with it.

Deanimator - he shoots he scores

Richard, who works at DreamHaven, came in sunday with a score of 257 printed on a piece of paper. I can't break a hundred yet. Play more here.

Darth Vader reads your mind.

You can go to this Burger King site and have Darth Vader read your mind. He guessed iron in 19 questions. It's fun.

Space Truckers

I picked up a dvd of Space Truckers for $3.99 today. It was used but it plays fine. Not a great film but a fun film. Dennis Hopper is a interplanetary rig jocky in this 1996 Stuart Gordon film. Dennis unknowingly picks up a load of organic robot super warriors and heads to earth. He's joined by Debi Mazar, who looks marvelous and Stephen Dorff, who I could care less about. Charles Dance plays the designer of the robots, and later he looses his weiner. Bummer for him, his mechanical one scares the girls, as it should. There are more good things than bad things in this movie. Everybody seems to like the square pigs, Hopper's first load, before the killer robots. There's a nice happy ending and some fun stuff happens to get us there. Dennis gets a girl too.