PRIMITIVE SCREWHEADS

Friday Night Movies 849

Gonks Go Beat 1965 From an original story by Robert Hartford-Davis and Peter Newbrook, screenplay by Jimmy Watson, directed by Robert Hartford-Davis. I'd seen a couple of Robert's other directing jobs, The Black Torment and The Sandwich Man. They were better than this film. A few of his other titles might have some merit. I downloaded a few from YouTube, someday i might have time to watch them. The DVD is part of The British Film series from Network. Gonks were a faddish toy from the era. Lulu sings the theme song Chocolate Ice.

The story is set some years in the future and the people of Earth are split into two groups. The folks of Beatland are hipsters who listen to an early form of rock n roll. The folks of Ballad Isle are pretty straight and listen to boring pop songs. They don't care for each other's music and there's tension on the planet as the annual musical contest comes up.

The Great Galaxian sends a representative to assess the situation and keep things from boiling over. He's supposed to bring the two sides together or he's going to be assigned to the planet Gonk. No one wants to go there.

Kenneth Conner plays the representative, he's a bit of a nervous Nelly and not very effective. He observes both sides and takes a meeting with Mr A&R, the man who runs the musical contest and is the contest's impartial judge. They come up with a Romeo and Juliet sort of plan to hook up a Beatland boy with a Ballad Isle girl. The couple preform a song at the end of the musical contest. It's the winner and everyone gets together and dances.

It's got a stupid story, poorly executed, with plenty of overacting, odd sets and the goofy turned up to eleven. Some of the 16 songs are hardly worth hearing. Of musical interest, the Beatland opening song features the Graham Bond Organization with Graham on vocals, sax and keyboards, Ginger Baker on drums, Jack Bruce on bass, Dick Heckstall-Smith on sax and John McLaughlin on guitar. All that talent and not much of a song.

The movie was a big flop but later developed a bit of a cult following. I hadn't ever heard of it until I ordered it from Network last week. I can't recommend it to anyone really, perhaps it's it's lucky there isn't a copy on the internet to look at. You can see some of the songs on YouTube.

The Outing 1987 Written by Warren Chaney and directed by Tom Daley. An American film that was released in the UK in April 1987 under the title The Lamp, it came out in September 1987 in the US under the title The Outing.

In an opening scene we see a monster murder the people on a ship. Only a little girl escapes, she takes a lamp and a bracelet with her. We jump to modern day and a nasty trio of scumbags comes to rob an old lady in her home. They kill the old lady with their bad acting and smash up her house looking for money they think is there. They find a box with the lamp and bracelet. The jinn in the lamp gets released and then slaughters the trio.

The cops send the effects from the house to a museum, though I can't fathom why. Alex is the teen daughter of the museum's archeologist, she decides to sneak into the place for a sleep over with her friends. Her horrible ex-boyfriend hears her plan, he sneaks in with a pal to get back at her and her new boyfriend. The friends pair off and the jinn starts killing.

First the guard goes, then a guy gets torn in two, some of the action seems to take place while the camera is looking in another direction. There's plenty of running about and yelling, often the sound goes from quiet to annoyingly loud. It doesn't take too long to kill most everyone off but the daughter. She gets rescued and destroys the lamp in the museum's incinerator.

It's got a few entertaining bits but it's got a tired story, awful characters and poor acting. Some of the monster bits weren't too bad but there's nothing outstanding. I wouldn't be picking one up for my collection. I'd only recommend it to the horror fan who wants to see it all.

Seven Footprints To Satan 1929

Seven Footprints To Satan 1929 Based on the 1928 novel Seven Footprints To Satan by A Merritt, story, screenplay and direction by Benjamin Christensen. Benjamin is Danish and the director of the 1922 silent film Haxan. In 1924 he got hired to direct pictures for MGM. He didn't make many films and I haven't seen any of them, other than Haxan and now this. Haxan is sort of interesting, it's a documentary on witches, there's a shorter version out there with narration by William S Burroughs. It's on the Criterion DVD along with the full length version.

Seven Footprints To Satan was shot silent but had some sound added for a second release. The film was lost for quite some time but a couple of prints turned up. I put a link in the title to a copy on YouTube, it's not the best quality image but it seems the most complete version and it's been "restored".

A rich young man called James, played by Creighton Hale, figures he should go off exploring in Africa, his Uncle Joe tries to talk him out of it. Thelma Todd plays his fiance Eve. Her father has a party and there's a robbery, James and Eve jump into her chauffeur driven limousine only to find they've been kidnapped to a strange house in the country.

There they find themselves in the hands of a black robed figure who calls himself Satan. He has quite the throne, huh. Those are the seven footprints to Satan, one of the few plot points from the novel that made it into the movie. In an interview with A Merritt from 1933 he says he watched the film and wept. Benjamin turned Merritt's dark crime novel into an old dark house comedy. I just read the novel and the movie really has very little of the book in it. The movie did poorly at the box office and Merritt claims it hurt the sales of the novel.

I liked parts of the movie, occasionally there was a silly bit, but in the end I was disappointed that it wasn't more like the novel. You can check it out in the link above, you might like it well enough to get to the end. I didn't care for the music much. I doubt I'd watch it again but I did save a download for that future possibility.

The Black Hand Gang 1930

The Black Hand Gang 1930 Based on a play called Black Hand George by Bert Lee and R P Weston, screenplay by Victor Kendall, directed by Monty Banks.

Wee Georgie Wood is the kid in the black suit, he's third from the left, he was 34 years old when the picture was made but he's playing a young boy. Georgie started appearing on the stage at age 5 and made a good bit of cash in the music halls of the UK. He was 2 silent pictures and a TV movie from 1951. He appeared in three TV shows, one in 1951, another in 1959, the third in 1970.

Georgie is head of the Black Hand Gang, a bunch of poor kids who run the streets. They have some adventures and cause a bit of trouble. Somehow they hook up with a rich kid who invites them over for tea. It doesn't go so well and there's plenty of broken crockery at the end of the meal. A street encounter with a rival gang leaves the local push cart vendors in shambles. It's a tough neighborhood.

Mostly it was kind of fun, some of the gags work well enough, some don't. The acting is a mixed bag, kind of broad but watchable. I'd watched a copy off the Internet Archive, while looking for images I found the cover to the DVD I already had. I'll be getting to that set of British comedies after I get through the other DVDs in The British Film series from Network. It all takes time.

Do You Know This Voice 1964

Do You Know This Voice? 1964 Based on the 1960 novel by Evelyn Berckman, screenplay by Neil McCallum, directed by Frank Nesbitt. Part of the Network series The British Film. Like all their releases, the DVD is Region 2 and won't play in most US players. The DVDs will play on a PC DVD drive with the help of VLC Player or in region free DVD players.

Dan Duryea is a hospital orderly who lives in a row house with his wife played by Gwen Watford. Isa Miranda plays the older lady in the house next door. A child is kidnapped, the family get a ransom call, the police are called in, the second call is traced to a phone box. The police race around to the box only to find Isa in it. She's taken down to the local police station and questioned. She just can't just seem to remember who the person was who was ahead of her, she was looking down when the person walked by, she just remembers their feet and the bottom of their coat.

Over at Dan and Gwen's place we find them in a tissy, turns out Dan is the kidnapper and Gwen was the ransom caller, she was wearing Dan's trench coat when she called. Now they're worried that Isa will remember and it'll be the noose for Dan. He'd accidentally killed the kid and left the body where it was found the same day. If only he had waited, the UK abolished the death penalty the following year.

Isa wants to help the police catch the killer but she still can't remember the person's face. She suggests that they lie and say she remembered who the man was. Gwen used a more masculine voice for the call and it fooled everyone. We spend the rest of the movie watching Dan and Gwen fall to pieces, they try to murder Isa but they are incompetant criminals, they royally screw things up for themselves.

I thought it was a good bit above average, with a cracking script, an excellent cast, plenty of activity, and a nice sense of humor too. Worth a look for any mystery fan. Glad I picked one up, I'll watch it again someday.

Death Is A Woman 1966

Death Is A Woman 1966 Written by Wallace Bosco and directed by Frederic Goode. A British film that was partially show in Malta. It's part of Network's The British Film series.

Patsy Ann Noble plays the woman of the title, that's her on the poster, she was an Australian pop star and actress who started called herself Trisha Noble the year after this movie came out. In the 70s she moved to Hollywood and appeared on a lot of popular TV shows.

In her first movie she's a loose cannon in a smuggling ring. In the opening scene she murders a man but is seen. Now she's got to murder that guy too. Mark Burns is an agent investigating the ring. The two men were his suspects. There's the usual sort of movie criminal activity, carried out by an assortment of characters. On the other side there are some typical cops and government agents helping Mark. There's nothing outstanding about the film, other than some of the nice Malta views, but there was usually something watchable going. I gave it a generous 5 and would watch it again sometime.

Ideally I would like to rewatch at all the titles in The British Film series again. There are 498 DVDs listed on the spreadsheet I've created from the listings on their site and that doesn't include the 135 extra titles on DVDs with more than one movie on them. Not all of them seem to be in print and they do add more movies all the time. I think I have a lot of the ones I'm interested in, crime movies and comedies for me thanks, but they keep putting out more titles that I think I would like to see. Since the cheap shipping dried up on Amazon UK I've relied on the occasional sale on the Network site. I just put in an order this week. Buy One Get One Free. You need to order a lot to make the £30 shipping seem reasonable. 

Science Fiction Sunday 649

Doctor Who 0022 The Massacre Four part story that aired February 5-26 1966. Written by John Lucarotti and Donald Tosh, directed by Paddy Russell. Linking script by Stephen Cole and Sue Cowley, narrated by Peter Purvis. Another story that's missing, there is no known footage from the series, some behind the scenes photos survive. I haven't heard this story before.

Lucarotti wrote the serial but script editor Tosh rewrote a good bit of it. It was the last serial Tosh worked on as script editor, he did rewrite much of Brian Hughes script for 0024 The Celestial Toymaker, that script was then rewritten by Gerry Davis, the new script editor. Davis created Jamie McCrimmon and was co-creator, along with Kit Pedler, of the Cybermen. The pair would later team up for the TV series Doomwatch.

The Tardis gang arrive in 1572 France just before the St Bartholomew's Day Massacre. Peter Purvis is still hanging on as the Doctor's companion Steven. The streets are unsafe but the Doctor insists on going into the city to visit Charles Preslin, an apothecary. We don't see the Doctor for much of the story, we do see William Hartnell playing a second role, that of the Abbot Of Amboise.

Steven meets a a Huguenot called Nicholas Muss who offers him a place to stay out of the curfew. They meet a servant girl named Ann who's heard of plot against the Huguenots. Steven sees the Abbot and thinks it's the Doctor in disguise but he's not.

Steven tries to track down the Doctor, Preslin's shop is empty and he's told by a local that the shop has been vacant two years, ever since the man was arrested and imprisoned. Steven learns of a plot against a man called the Sea Beggar and with Ann call on the Abbot to see if it the Doctor. The Abbot is killed in the street as he arrives at the man's home.

The Doctor arrives with an urge to flee the city, he tells Ann to go back to her aunt's house. It's the eve before the massacre and he can't change history. Inside the Tardis Steven is upset that the Doctor didn't try to stop it and didn't take Ann along. The Tardis arrives in 1966 Wimbledon Common and Steven leaves the ship. As the Doctor wonders about his life Dodo Chaplet, played by Jackie Lane, enters the Police Box to call the police. Steven pops in, he's seen the girl go into the Tardis and he comes to warn the Doctor that police are approaching. Before he realizes Dodo is there, the Doctor takes off. Dodo isn't too worried that she's in a time travelling spaceship.

A lot of people seem to like the serial, it would be nice to see the images that are missing, at least the audio is quite decent. I do still find Steven somewhat annoying but over all the story is entertaining.

Doctor Who 0023 The Ark Four part story that aired March 5-26 1966. Written by Paul Erickson and Lesley Scott, directed by Michael Imison.

I posted about this back in 2013. Click the link above to see the post, I pretty much feel the same about the serial.

Scream Of Fear 1961

Scream Of Fear 1961 Screenplay by Jimmy Sangster and directed by Seth Holt. Original UK title is Taste Of Fear.

Susan Strasberg is the daughter of a rich man she hasn't seen in ten years. She gets a letter her father inviting her home, she arrives at his French Riviera estate to find her father has left on a business trip. Ann Todd plays her stepmother, Ronald Lewis plays the chauffeur, and Christopher Lee plays the rich guy's doctor.

Susan is in a wheelchair, while wondering about the grounds she looks in the unused guest house only to find her father sitting in a chair, dead as can be. She screams and rolls quickly to the house, when help comes there's no body to be found. Ann tries to convince Susan that it was stress from the recent death of her roommate.

Things get more and more sinister, reminding one that big piles of cash make murderers out of so many. There's a nice script and good ending. Something I'd watch again sometime.

Friday Night Movies 848

Saturday Morning Mystery 2012 Story by Kat Chandler, Jonny Mars and Jason Wehling, screenplay by Joey Balsimo, Aron Leggett and Jason Wehling, directed by Spencer Parsons.

Some paranormal investigators are broke and useless at finding ghosts. They have a paid gig at a haunted mansion, then they arrive they find there's something in the house but it ain't a ghost.

This Scooby gang parody starts off fairly well, then drifts into a poorly written second act where all the characters open up about their personal problems. That really killed my interest in the characters and their story. The third act ramps up the violence but by the end I was glad it was over. I thought it was below average and I wouldn't want to see it again.

Netherbeast Incorporated 2007 Written by Bruce Dellis and directed by Dean Matthew Ronalds.

Steve Burns is an office worker called Otto Granberry, and he works at Berm-Tech Industries, Darrel Hammond is his boss Turner. Steve gets called into Turner's office only to find Mike staked through the heart. Turner tells Otto he's got to rewrite Mike's report by Tuesday and he didn't kill Mike because of the poor report, he killed Mike because he was a vampire. Turner wants Otto to dispose of the body and get on that report.

We soon find out that Berm-Tech Industries is a very old company and all the workers are immortal netherbeasts that are often called vampires. They all live in Arizona, on the top of the Berm-Tech office block, they hardly ever go outside, living people don't get past the receptionist. The netherbeasts don't care to be called vampires, they have their own backstory and their problem is caused by a growth on their hearts. They drink human blood and eat human flesh but they don't murder to get their food anymore, they have a system in place to get fresh bodies.

Turner creates two issues, he hires a living woman to replace Mike and he's hired Judd Nelson to study the company's work habits and report. On top of that mess, some employees are murdered by an unseen person. Otto, office manager Dave Foley and Mike's replacement team up to try to figure out what's going on.

I'd seen this last week on Amazon Prime and liked it so much that I immediately ordered the DVD. I enjoyed it as much the second time through. It's a good solid comedy with a good script that's got funny jokes. There's a bit of romance, a murder mystery, a hostile take over and plenty of fresh blood. I'll be glad to see this down the road sometime.

Death At Broadcasting House 1934

Death At Broadcasting House 1934 Bases on the novel Death at Broadcasting House
by Val Gielgud & Holt Marvell, screenplay by Val Gielgud, Holt Marvell and Basil Mason, directed by Reginald Denham. Val is John Gielgud's brother, at the time he wrote the novel he was the BBC Head Of Productions.The film is set in the BBC's new center Broadcasting House. It was built in 1932 and it's still in use today.

The film is part of The British Film series from Network. I have a stack of their DVDs still to watch, I had stopped buying stuff from the UK when the postage prices rose so much, then I stopped being interested in watching movies. I figured to take a bit of a dip into the stack, as long as interest holds. Nice thing about these old British films is they're often fairly short and briskly paced.

During a radio broadcast a man is strangled. An inspector from Scotland Yard is called into the case. He soon finds the dead guy didn't have any friends around the building. There's a passel of characters, we see them moving about in the offices and studios of Broadcast House. We get a bit of what it's like to record a radio program. There's music from some lady singers and a band or two, there's even dancing girls. It's got a fairly good mystery and a nice sense of humor. Over all it was quite entertaining. I'd watch it again sometime.

The Intergalactic Adventures Of Max Cloud 2020

The Intergalactic Adventures Of Max Cloud 2020 Written by Sally Collett and Martin Owen, directed by Martin Owen. A British movie that's a bit of a love letter to the the side scrolling video games of 30 years ago.

The young woman in the poster is Sarah, she's played by Isabelle Allen, she's a gamer who gets transported into the Max Cloud video game. She becomes Jake, the chef on Max's ship, he's the guy on the left side of the picture above, he's played by Elliot James Langridge. Max is the guy next to him, he's played by Scott Adkins, I just watched him in a movie last night. The cowboy looking guy is Brock Donnelly, he's a baddie played by Tommy Flanagan. The lady on the right is Sally Collett, she plays Rexy, like Sarah, she's been brought into the video game. John Hannah plays Revengor, he plays the boss that's got to be beat at the end of the game.

Sarah hopes that by winning she can get released from the game, the problem is she's only got one life, the game won't pause, and her pal Cowboy is playing for her. He's not a very good gamer and that nearly puts an end to poor Sarah. Don't worry she'll be fine. She gets some help from an unexpected source.

It's a pretty silly movie, while still being fairly clever. I liked the characters and the mix of live action and video game. A good bit of the action is depicted in game format but mostly it's live action on a set. The production values were fairly good and the sets entertaining, their cheapness fits the style of the period game. There are good number of gags, some were funny to me, some were less funny. I might not have gotten the joke, or they just weren't that good. They poke fun at heroes, sidekicks and gender roles in games. Those jokes were easy to get but some might have a dim view of them. The rating spread on the IMDb is kind of interesting. Just over a third of the votes are in the 5-7 range but it's overall score is only a 4.8, I think it should be higher than that. No matter, I still enjoyed it, I'd recommend it to the person who might like a video game parody. I'd even watch it again but doubt I'll buy the video. Maybe if it gets cheap enough, it's just fairly new.