PRIMITIVE SCREWHEADS

Friday Night Movies 1039

Her Vengeance 1988 Written by Shirley Woo Suet-Lai and directed by Lam Nai-Choi. A Hong Kong rape-vengeance film. It's a remake of the 1973 Kiss of Death. I've seen a few of Nam's other films: The Seventh Curse, Peacock King, Erotic Ghost Story, Story of Ricky and The Cat.

A woman called Ying works at a nightclub in Macao. She gets attacked and raped by some customers she had thrown out for causing trouble. The 5 guys are Hong Kong triad scumbags who rob and kill for a living. Raping and beatings are just fun for these guys. Ying's blind sister encourages her to get revenge. Ying goes to see ex-triad Hung in Hong Kong, he won't help her with her vengeance, but he gives her a job in his club. Ying meets a reporter at the club, there's the start of a romance but it doesn't go anywhere other than death.

Ying meets one of the rapists outside Hung's club, she gets another club hostess to lure him into the club. Ying makes a play to get him out of the club. He takes her on his motorcycle, along the way the gang guy beats up a couple of guys in a bathroom and takes the car of one of his victims. Ying eventually kills the rapist and that opens a door to trouble for her friends and relatives. By the end of the movie all the baddies are dead, several other random people are dead and all her friends and  relatives are dead. Ying survives and wonders of into the distance as the credits roll.

The movie starts off with the gangsters acting up in a club, followed by the attack and rape scene, then it gets rather dull for a while. Once the revenge kicks in it gets more interesting. Ying makes some weapons, it's hard to get guns in Hong Kong. I hadn't noticed but someone pointed out that the police are noticeably absent. 

It was nice getting some revenge on such scumbags but poor Ying isn't very good at it. I did laugh out loud a couple of times, not at jokes, just some ludicrous scenes of violence. Some of Nam's other movies, especially Story Of Ricky, are known for some over the top action that often makes no sense.

We watched the new Vinegar Syndrome Blu-ray. Looks nice and Ryan, one of my pals, contributes to the commentary track. Looking forward to listening to that. There are two versions of the film on the disc and there's a second disc with another movie. We watched the CatIII version. There's a CatII version with less nudity and violence.

Legend Of The Eight Samurai 1983 Based on the 1982 novel Shin Satomi Hakkenden by Toshiro Kamata, screenplay by Toshio Kamata and Kinji Fukasaku, directed by Kinji Fukasaku. A Japanese fantasy film with Sonny Chiba. I saw this first in 2002, I don't remember watching it again. I've seen a few movies by Director Kinji: Black Lizard, The Green Slime, Tora! Tora! Tora!, Message From Space and Virus. His last two films were Battle Royal and Battle Royal II: Requiem. Some of them were better than others.

The family of Princess Shizu is killed and the princess goes on the run. She's aided by a young guy called Shinbei. On the way they meet Dōsetsu, played by Sonny, who tells her of the curse on her family. He shows her a glowy bead with writing on it. Eight warriors have these beads, eight warriors who can help her defeat the evil queen Tamazusa. They meet the bead holders on the way to Tamazusa's castle. There are some fights and plenty of running about before get there. Most everyone dies.

There's some entertaining bits but the movie is 136 mins and it seems bloated with padding. It's a bit pokey at times. It would be nice to tighten up some scenes and move the story along a bit quicker. After watching it I figured I wouldn't need the recent Blu-ray, especially at $30 on Amazon.

Blood Stained Tradewinds 1990

Blood Stained Tradewinds 1990 Written by Philip Cheng and directed by Yuen Chor. A Hong Kong gangster film with Waise Lee.

Waise is Hung and Alex Fong is Sing and members of a triad, the head of the group is Uncle Lung. He's getting old and his illness forces him to name a successor. He picks Sing but Sing refuses to be head of the gang. He's kicked out of the gang and he goes to work for a fireworks manufacturer. Hung gets the job and the hand of Uncle Lung's daughter Sophia.

Hung has trouble leading the gang because of his violent ways. Other members are unhappy with him. He's also got trouble with a Japanese yakuza gang. The Japanese kill Uncle Lung and kidnap Sophia. Sing has to return to the gang to help fight the yakuza. There's plenty of family drama and some gun battles.

It's an average film, nothing inspired going on here. I enjoyed parts of it but doubt I'll rewatch it in the future. It was Chor's last feature film as a director, he did keep on acting through 2002. I've seen him in a lot of films as an actor but not seen that many of his directed works. He started acting and directing in 1957. He was born in 1934 and died in 2022.

Friday Night Movies 1037

Panda Plan 2024 Written by Wei Xu, Meng Yida and Luan Zhang, directed by Luan Zhang. A Jackie Chan action comedy.

Jackie plays a version of himself, he goes to a zoo to take part in sponsoring a rare version of the panda. An Arab sheik wants the panda, some mercenaries want his $100 mil. The Sheik has a sad backstory that is revealed at the end. That could have been easily left out, it's so heavy handed and cliched. 

Jackie arrives at the zoo, shortly after the mercenaries arrive to get the panda. Things don't go so easy for the mercenaries with Jackie there. It's like they bought their slapstick in bulk and spread it all over. There's some good number of fight scenes but it's mostly low throttle martial arts and silly action bits. I'm impressed Jackie can do some of the stunts himself. You can often tell when it's a stunt double.

It's all very colorful and noisy, the story is too simple, generally the script is weak, it's more suitable for kids and grans. There's plenty of jokey bits but no one dies. A baddie gets panda poop in his mouth. People are knocked out, even Jackie, he was knocked out during a stunt involving putting his head in a headlock. There's plenty of gun fire but no one gets shot. The animals were CGI. There was a robot delivery cart with a personality. He was always chatting up the ladies.

I enjoyed it for the most part but it's not up to Jackie's older action comedies. It still made money in the theater in China, it cost $24 mil to make and pulled $36 mill out of the Chinese box office. I had picked up a copy when I saw it on Amazon, I try to buy all the Jackie films, I'd hope to watch it again sometime.

Signals 1970

I watched this August 2024 and posted a comment on Science Fiction Sunday 809. There's a link there to the version of the film I watched on YouTube. The Blu-ray we watched was much better looking. All that didn't make the dull script much better. People's minds were wondering between the gulf between the sentences. I didn't mind that the time I watched it before but I bet I watched it at 1.5 speed. It does help a lot of stories out.

Bionic Ninja 1986

Bionic Ninja 1986 Written and directed by Godfrey Ho. A Hong Kong movie that uses scenes from the 1984 Hong Kong film The Daring Kung-Fu Refugee with some new footage.

KGB and CIA spies battle for a scientific discovery that could save or destroy the world. A Ninja organization has the secret, the CIA sends Agent Tommy to get the discovery back. There's some fighting but no bionic ninjas.

All in all a very poor film that I wouldn't watch again if you paid me. The producers even stole all the music from other films and TV shows. That's movie producers at their worst. They need a mighty punch in their gentleman's sausage from the flaming skull of Paul Naschy.

 

Friday Night Movies 1034

Rumpelstiltskin 1995 Written by Mark Jones and Joe Ruby, directed by Mark Jones. We watched the Terror Vision release. They have an annoyingly loud logo when you pop in the disc. Someone needs a shot of Paul Naschy's flaming skull drilled into their gentleman's sausage area.

The movie opens with a group of villagers chasing Rumpelstiltskin and burning him alive. He curses the villagers, he'll get his revenge in 1000 years. After the fire dies down all that's left of Rumpy is a stone image of him. It gets tossed in some water and we jump ahead 1000 years to Los Angeles.

A cop is killed on the job while his pregnant wife listens to the shooting on the phone. It was a badly written scene, the cop didn't even defend himself, the criminal managed to shot him 3 times before he fell over. The partner managed to shoot the criminal in the noggin. The partner disappears from the film.

Months pass and the baby is fairly big. The wife's friend takes her to a goofy antique shop where she buys the Rumpy lump. She takes it home and unknowingly activates the cursed stone. She had wished her husband would return to her, he does, next morning Rumpy shows up and wants the baby for it's soul. The wife manages to escape and the rest of the movie is her being chased by Rumpy looking to get that soul.

It's got a decent baddie but the script is poor and the actors so-so. It didn't do so well at the Box Office and the IMDb score is 4.7, I didn't think it was worth a 5. Writer director Mark Jones had written and directed the first Leprechaun movie. That was a better film. The only other movie I had seen of his was Triloquist and that was below average. Not one I need to buy for my collection.

The Shaolin Plot 1977 Based on a novel by Kuang Ni, screenplay and direction by Huang Feng. We watched the Arrow Blu-ray release. The movie was filmed in South Korea.

The baddie is collecting Shaolin martial arts books. The Shaolin monks aren't that interested in giving them up without a fight. Sammo Hung is one of the baddies. 

The production looks good with plenty of big sets and nice locations. There's plenty of fights and action but movie is rather slow at times. A good bit of trimming would have been appropriate. I enjoyed most of it but I was struggling to stay awake in the middle of it. I wasn't the only one. I'd still watch it again sometime but would FF during the dull bits. I hope to catch the commentaries at some point. I see they are the same ones as on the Eureka Release.

 

Friday Night Movies 1031

Doberman Cop 1977 Based on the Doberman Deka manga written by Buronson and illustrated by Shinji Hiramatsu, screenplay by Kōji Takada, directed by Kinji Fukasaku. A Japanese cop movie starring Sony Chiba as a small town cop from Ishigaki Island.

Sonny plays Kano, he's come to Shinjuku because of the local police think the burnt corpse in an apartment is possibly Yuna Tamashiro. Kano knows Yuna's mother, she's a noro, a priestesses of the Ryukyuan religion. The mother predicts Kano and Yuna will marry. The Shinjuku police make fun of Kano for being a bumpkin, he brought a pig to give to the chief of detectives as a gift. The pig was turned down so Kano has to schlep the critter around for the rest of the movie.

Kano gets some big time new headlines for rescuing a singer held hostage from an obsessive fan in her 20th floor apartment by rappelling down the side of the building and smashing through the window. Kano believes that the singer Miki might be Yuna but she says she's not. Her manager Hidemori is a yakuza who's also in love with Miki. Things get more and more complicated and violent as Kano bashes his way around town. When the police don't help him he takes some help from the biker who was the burnt woman's friend and his pals. Eventually Kano blasts the real killer.

It's a non-stop riot of color and noise. I though the movie should have been called Saidaigen no sakebi or Maximum Yelling. There's plenty of fights, gun battles and lots of yelling. Everyone is yelling all the time and the volume ramps up the more emotional they get. Bodies pile up and Kano is often responsible. I enjoyed the heck out of it and would watch it again.

Angel With The Iron Fists 1967 Written by Wei Shih and directed by Wei Lo. A Chinese action film with secret agents infiltrating a criminal gang called the Dark Angels.

Agent 009 works for the police, she's infiltrating the Dark Angels. She pretends to be rich and the girlfriend of Baldy, a big time criminal who's locked up. Baldy's gang is after her because she refuses to share a suitcase of cash with them. Agent 009 makes contact with a jeweler who's part of the DA. The DA are a ruthless gang, they like robbing and killing. Cross them and you're dead, try to leave the gang and you're dead.I suspect that's their retirement plan too.

They have a nice underground secret base, imagine something like a James Bond villain might have but cheaper and smaller. There's plenty of sneaking about, some murders, some fights and plenty of driving about in cars. Sadly the movie is too long and the action rather tame. Some of the fights are a bit embarrassing, arms flailing like a windmill of bones. Some of the score was entertaining, not the singing parts, they were way tedious.

I still enjoyed it, it was pretty darn funny, not on purpose for most of it. It's part of a three film Blu-ray set from Eureka, all the films are of the same sort, the other two films are The Golden Buddha and The Singing Thief. I hope to get to that fairly soon.

 

Science Fiction Sunday 826

Metamorphosis 2022 Directed by Liangyan Chen. The film and the IMDb list no writer. An Asian dinochomp film that's mostly people running in corridors.

A scientist has created a T-rex that can turn invisible. It gets out when the cleaning lady opens the cage to clean up the meat blobs on the floor. The beasty pops into view and gobbles her up right quick. Given free range of the lab the T-Rex starts chomping on the other scientists. People run around yelling and trying to escape.

Besides the T-Rex there are two giant snakes to run away from. Hardly anyone survives but it's not overly gorey. It's like a PG rated film, maybe it was made for TV. It scores 4.8 on the IMDb. I gave it a 3 because of the giant snakes. They were entertaining. The story on it's own would get a 2 from me.

Danger! Danger! 2021 Written and directed by Lexie Findarlee Trivundza and Nick Trivundza. A time travel movie with too little time travel and too much blather.

A guy parachutes onto a tiny island near Africa. He hopes to find a time machine in a temple. Trouble is there are Nazis there looking for the same device. He gets shot by the Nazis and rescued by a couple of Americans. He manages to find the machine and the movie ends like it's part one.

It scores a surprising 2.8 on the IMDb, I gave it a 3 but only because of all the nice location shooting at Vasquez Rocks Natural Area Park. I love that place, I don't care for the movie that much. I'm not going to watch it again, that's for sure. This one was on free with membership on Amazon Prime.

Friday Night Movies 1021

Future Cops 1993 Written and directed by Wong Jing. A Chinese action comedy that's loosely based on the game Street Fighter II: The World Warrior. It's not an authorized adaptation so they can't use the real character names. Wong had already adapted Street Fighter characters in the Jackie Chan film City Hunter. Wong directed that in 1993 along with 7 other films. He'd officially adapt the game in 1994 with the release of Street Fighter: The Ultimate Battle.

The movie starts in 2043, The General is trying to take over the world, the Future Cops are trying to stop him. The General's plan is to go back in time and kill the judge that's sentencing him in the future. The Future Cops use a time machine to go into the past to stop The General's gang members. Andy Lau, Jacky Cheung and Simon Yam are the Future Cops. Ken Lo plays The General, his minions are played by Ekin Cheng, Billy Chow and William Duen.

Back in 1993 the Future Cops contact Tai-hung, the future judge, and stay at the family house. Dicky Cheung plays Tai-hung, Chingmy Yau plays his sister Chun-may, Kingdom Yuen plays the mother Chun-doi and Richard Ng plays her boyfriend Uncle Richard.

Tai-hung gets picked on at school but the Future Cops help him out. There's a lot of stuff going on at the school and some of the gags are fun. Wong is the king of wacky comedy, often called Makes No Sense Comedy. His jokes aren't always funny, some go over my head because I don't get the gag, other are just plain dumb fart jokes and the like. The last half the movie is packed with action and huge set pieces. The sets take a beating as people smash through walls and ceilings. Eventually the baddies are defeated and things get back to normal.

I thought I might have seen this back in the 90s when there was a lot of Asian Martial Arts cinema happening locally. It turns out it was only 2014 when I saw it. It was Friday Night Movies 504 - 11-29-2014. I enjoyed most of the movie and might watch it again someday. 

The People's Joker 2023 Written by Vera Drew and Brit LeRose, directed by Vera Drew. An unofficial parody of The Joker and Batman comics.

It's a dystopian future and Batman is real, once he retired Gotham City has fallen into the control of the baddies. In Smallville Kansas a young boy wonders about his gender, he asks his mother if he was born in the wrong body. Mom's a high strung woman who shouldn't be raising plants. She sends him to Arkam Asylum for some therapy, Dr Crane prescribes Smylex, a vape that gives the user a forced smile and covers up some of the depression and anxiety.

Fifteen years later our young boy is calling herself Vera. She takes a chance and leaves for Gotham City to try to join the cast of UBC Live. It's a sketch comedy show with a program to create jokemen. She works with her favorite jokeman Ra's Al Ghul. Vera becomes a Jokeman because of her mostly male attributes. Sadly in the comedy world of the future, women are assigned to be nameless Harlequins to serve as dancers for the Jokemen. Vera starts her own anti-comedy troupe and takes the name Joker the Harlequin. She sets up in an abandoned theater. I did enjoy some of the stand up here though it's pretty hit or miss.

It's an interesting looking film with plenty of animation and special effects. The movie gets more and more complicated as more characters and concepts are introduced. I can't say I wholeheartedly enjoyed the movie. There were a few bits that made me laugh but many of jokes fall flat. It's not something I would watch again, not because it's bad, mostly because it's just a drama about someone struggling with life, drugs, gender and dating. I'm not really interested in the drama, something I triage from my viewing when possible. Life's too short to spend it watching miserable people telling me their troubles. I mean, who would want to hang out with the Kramers, not this fuckin' guy, I'll tell you that for free.

Friday Night Movies 1018

Corpse Mania 1981 Written by Chih-Hung Kuei and On Szeto, directed by Chih-Hung Kuei. A Chinese police procedural involving murder and necrophilia from the Shaw Brothers. We watched the new Vinegar Syndrome release.

A couple of women are murdered and then raped. They remind the cops of an old crime from several years back, turns out the rapist murder has been released from the mental home a month ago. The story uses flashback to fill in the back story. Much of the story takes place at the local brothel or the police station.The killer picks off a few of the women at the brothel. Eventually the police have a suspect and work to track him down. 

It's an average police story with a bit of action and plenty of meal worms. The print looks nice and it's not as gory as you'd think. I enjoyed it more than I thought I would but not enough to buy a copy.

The Ghost Dance 1982 Written by Peter F Buffa and Robert Sutton, directed by Peter F Buffa. Another new release from Vinegar Syndrome. The Wikipedia says the film was the first slasher film to have Native American characters.

An archaeologist, Dr Foster, has excavated a Native American corpse. It turns out to cause all sorts of trouble. The local elders are upset about the desecration. The corpse was a shaman, his unearthing has given him the chance to possess the local shaman. He starts killing people around the university. Dr Foster fights him off with the help of her boyfriend. 

Sadly it's below average and rather dull at times. It's one I wouldn't need to buy for myself.

Spiritually A Cop 1991

Spiritually A Cop 1991 Written and directed by Wai Shum. A Chinese action comedy about a ghost and the police.

Fong Lui wanted to be a cop but the police force says he's too short. He gets killed near the start of the movie and a ghost pops out of his body. Stanley Sui-Fong Fung plays the head cop of the precinct, his main desire is to get married and go on his honeymoon. Hoi Mang plays a visiting monk who is the only one who can detect the ghost. He helps Fong get used to being a ghost. The ghost is a misogynist, he doesn't think women should be on the force. The monk helps him get past this too. Yukari Ôsnima plays one of the female cops in the precinct.

There's plenty of fights and some gun battles, most of the fights are fairly good. There are plenty of gags, not all the gags are great, misogyny comments aside, but a good number of jokes landed. It's pretty average but I enjoyed it anyway. I might watch it again.